Do you know what’s worse than being told you are going to die? Being told you are going to die and then having a rectal exam immediately after.
Unfortunately I experienced both this past week. I wasn’t quite expecting my cancer to be that bad. I only learned that I had a tumour on Dec. 19, 2018, and that it was cancerous on Dec. 24, 2018. (Merry Christmas!) I was led to believe I had a curable cancer and that my tumour could probably be removed somewhat easily, so I was a little surprised to see how much it had spread as the doctor scrolled through my CT and MRI scans pointing out the various “lesions consistent with cancer”.
I have stage 4 rectal cancer and it appears to have spread to my liver and lungs. The tumour in my rectum is a T3 in case you are curious. The doctor did not give me much hope, but so what? I know God can fix me.
Death is not to be feared for a Christian. I am not afraid of death; in fact, in some respects, I am looking forward to it. One of my first thoughts after the diagnosis was that I get to hang out with my Dad again and meet our first little baby that died in the first trimester of pregnancy. But then I remembered that I have a few people here on earth who would prefer that I live for at least a few more decades. Being a husband and father was one of my primary goals in life and I want to be with my wife and kids as long as possible.
We are going to fight this disease as hard as we can and for as long as necessary. Our number one plan of attack is prayer.
Before my diagnosis I had been learning a lot about prayer. I found John MacArthur’s sermon Pray Boldly particularly helpful and inspiring. The parable Jesus tells in Luke 11:5-13 is incredible. I don’t like asking people for anything, never mind asking the Creator of the universe over and over to do something. But Jesus tells us to pray boldly, to pray without ceasing, and to be shameless in our prayers.
Pray boldly for God to heal me and pray without ceasing.
This week I meet with two oncologists. Please pray that God will guide these doctors in their treatment plan for me.
I don’t want to give people the wrong impression. Lest you think I am bed-ridden in pain or something like that, I am not (at least not yet). With the exception of depositing blood into the toilet every few hours, I feel surprisingly fine right now considering what is growing inside my body. I have a little discomfort (not pain) in my rectum but that is it. I still work full-time (between appointments) and am fortunate to work two days a week from home. I am still doing other contract work on the side. I feel pretty good physically and excellent mentally.
I am excited to see how God will use this situation to His glory!
Wow. Dear brother, my heart aches for you and your lovely wife and kids. Your testimony of God’s grace and your love for Christ is a refreshing wind in the sails of the saints of God who also struggle with the assaults of the evil one. You explicit trust in the Lord and your dependence upon him encourages us greatly.
Let me encourage you. In 2015 I was diagnosed with male breast cancer. I ended up getting a mastectomy and radiation treatments (30). I live in Waterloo, and I spent 6 weeks in Toronto at Princess Margaret. I know the anxieties you feel and the whole mortality you feel, and the sense of being apart from those you love, and dealing with death as at one level, a joining with the Lord forevermore and the separation from your precious family. Death is most difficult on those who are left behind. Like your testimony, it is a thing not to be feared. Like you I prayed that I would live and have the days of my life extended. The Lord was gracious to extend my days and to restore areas of my life that needed His providential grace. I will be praying for you and your family. Be blessed my friend. Trust in the Lord. People are praying for you.
Hello,
I do not know you, but a friend of ours Adam Padfield shared your story and just wanted to encourage you in one who has witnessed and experienced healing of a cancerous tumour! My son was diagnosed at 11 months with a rare brain tumour. One that is highly to re- appear.
His was on the 2-3 stage out of 4. He went through surgery, 2 rounds of chemo and 30 rounds of radiation. We have witnessed a miracle when on a regular routine MRI a spot that remained had completely disappeared!! Before he had even started his radiation and he only underwent chemo to prevent growth of what was left after surgery. The Dr’s were left dumbfounded.
It’s been 2 yrs since his diagnosis without any re- appearance. We give God the glory!!
We will defiantly be fighting in prayer with you!! Our God is bigger then Cancer!! He’s Got you!!
I pray the same verse over you as you go through treatments of Mark 16:18
“ Even though they drink deadly poison, it will not hurt them at all”
We had several people bring this verse to our attention when going through treatments with our son. We claimed them over him!! Through his 2nd round of chemo and 30 rounds of radiation he didn’t suffer through any of the side effects. The nurses and Dr’s were astounded.
Praying for peace that surpasses all understanding. Praying for complete healing!!
We have experienced the power of prayer!! We had so so many people praying!! So many that we knew and didn’t know!! You are not alone in this fight!!
Hello there, I just wanted to let you know that if you need me for anything at all, feel free to reach out. I know that we don’t know each other very well, in fact I don’t even recall ever having a conversation with either of you. But I understand the trouble cancer brings. If you need food, or a babysitter, or a shoulder to cry on, or a drive somewhere… I will make myself available as best I can. I’m glad people are praying for you, and that you are finding it affective…..in my own journey I have found that actions speak louder than words. So, let me know if there’s anything I can do.
Nikki.
John, we were so sorry to hear about what you are facing in this diagnosis. We have been praying for you and your family and will continue to do so. God is able to do more than we can ask or imagine…. We’ll be praying for your healing and strength.
Hey brother,
I keep thinking about you a lot. I can appreciate and relate to the mixed feelings you have about all this, with a wife and 3 little kids that need you. I also keep thinking about the story of the man born blind, not because of anything done wrong but so that the works of God might be displayed in him for God’s glory (Jn 9). I have no idea what God has planned but I loved hearing your excitement to see how God will use this situation to His glory! We’re praying with you too!
Joe & Jenny
I’m not very good at knowing the “right” thing to say. I shudder to think of the horror of going through what you’re going through, and admire the courage and positive outlook you’re holding.
I know God holds you in the palm of his hand.
He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms
and carries them close to his heart; He gently leads those that have young. -Isaiah 40:11
I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you. -Isaiah 46:4
But I know how painful and devastating our experience in this life can be.
I am so sorry that you’re going through this.
For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you Isaiah -41:13